Hash #230 – Bike Hash!
Hash Details:
O.k. wankers. Here is the scoop for Thursday’s Bike Hash
We are meeting at Santa Rosa Park at 6:00pm. Bring a bike AND A HELMET….don’t have a bike? Bring yourself AND A HELMET SOMEONE CAN BORROW and hang out with the other wankers that didn’t have a bike and wait for all the wankers that did to show back up. Truth be told I am one-half of a glorious haring team so that part of the trail promises to be a pretty GD short as I haven’t been the saddle of my bike in about a year.
I am relying on instinct for this Hash.
your left hand when you are right handed….it doesn’t feel right and it takes a lot longer than usual, but in the long run the result is the same, you finish no matter what!! Even if you are in the fetal position crying because it’s starting to really hurt from all the friction……….but I digress.
Don’t forget this Hash is $10…..that’s right $10 buckaroos!! This is going to be a fundraiser for our very own Speedy Got Smallness as he attempts to mount his ride and pump up and down until he crosses the great United States and spills his seed in the Atlantic Ocean. (I made up that last part….kind of fantasy of mine…no me…..not Speedy spilling seed……nevermind!!)
don’t read my posts…………..wait…………………..
Let me tell you about Lauren’s Ride for the first time. Speedy Got Smallness is riding across the US next month to raise money for a specialized car for his sister. She was in an accident when she was 15 and requires a very special car to drive. I haven’t met her yet but my guess is she could probably kick most of your a**es so you best show up on Thursday and support Speedy. (donations of vagisil are gladly accepted as that is a long time to ride for anyone and I’m sure his po-po is going to get tired)
http://www.laurensride.org/ for the entire story and all kidding aside please consider making a donation if you cannot make it out Thursday. This is a very good cause and we have 167 members on the SLOHASH list. If everyone donated just $10 friggin dollars we could raise………..oh man hang on………….carry the two……..$167,000!!
That’s a lot of money!!
I know, I know…I can hear it know.. Waaaaaa….that’s like $10…….. That’s at least one hand job from Stubby……or maybe a hummer from Gurgler if he was still here. (or 1/20th of what Mr. Chi loses when he is REALLY drunk at poker) Get over it… this guy is spending 30+ days of 100+ miles of riding a day, you can spare $10.
In summary…… $10…..Santa Rosa Park…. 6:00 pm…. Bring a Bike, Bring a Helmet, and bring a good lawyer if you get to eff’d up, hop on your bicycle, and get pulled over because yes…that is a D.U.I. people. (sorry…that part was for Greasy Lei) On a side note, you might also want to put a dental and a orthopedic surgeon on standby given the history of Hasher’s and bicycles….Cuffy and Two in the Pink, Half in the Stink…I’m talking to you guys. …who did I miss?
on-on to finally doing something charitable in your pathetic empty lives you f*cking f*cks….
Matzi
(If nothing else please at least check out the website and like it on Facebook, kidding aside this is a great cause)
on-on
Matzo Balls