2013 SLOH3 Mis-Management
The new mismanagement team is as follows:
There you have it wanks your new mismanagement team! Any questions or complaints submit them to G…
2013 SLOH3 Mis-Management Campaign Speeches
“I am a fabulous candidate for GM because not only do I stop runners on trail to tell them about SLOH3, but I’ve rarely missed a hash for over 2 1/2 years always bringing beer and often times doing the job of hash cash yes I can do two things at once! The best reason of all is I will hare trail solo on Valentines Day.”
Lady Red Rocket
“Do you like being called out, put on the spot, and forced to do things against your will? If so elect me as your hare raiser! Expect fun surprises when no one volunteers to hare the next hash you could be the luck winner to be forcefully persuaded to be the next hare. But don’t worry I’ll yell surprise first which I’m told makes it ok.”
Buttload Of Homo
“I don’t think I’ll be able to compete with Lady Red Rockets speech, but here it goes… Vote for me. I’ll make sure that there is always a shitty, short and flat trail to be run… Oh yeah, and that there is a Butt-Load of beer and boob checks.
Butt-Load of Homo”
“Why should I, Atomic Beaver, be elected RA… ? I have lots of experience as an RA!! Both in the SLO hash and in other hashes. I can entertain drunken wanks such as yourselves… Let’s face it, you can have the funniest person in the world but stick them in front of you lot and some turn into Richard Nixon. My circles are wicked fun! I try to get everyone involved, I know a lot of fun songs, am creative with crimes and things done in circle and… And. Hmmm. I just realized how campaigning for RA also sounds like I want to be the head of an orgy??? Which brings me to another reason you should elect me… I have great boobs!! Surely the best pair of things to entertain drunken hashers? I mean, the vittles are fun to play with, but aesthetically speaking they look a bit like a vulture head resting on two used teabags… *just sayin…*
And lastly… “If it’s hollow, you can drink from it!!” are words I want to make you live by!
On on to Hashy Erections!!
“I Cant promise a damn thing if elected Ra but if assigned this prestigious position I will do my drunken best to bring the zombie arm back into the circle, Find out what happened to the hash shit, Teach you fucktards a few new songs, and recruit a willing or unwilling harriet to lead you lazy bastards in some occasional hash calisthenics prior to running these shitty trails! And there will be extra down downs for all who cum hashing with SLO H3!
ON ON …The Stranger”
“I am loud, annoying and obnoxious (I know you’re already thinking about Matzo, but bear with me). Asmuch as I’m all for equality, I do not believe that women should hold the following roles: sports newscasters (Erin Andrews only has a job because she is hot) and RA’s. In conclusion, I end my speech with this: vote for Stranger!”
Lady Red Rocket
“Vote for me! I can buy stuff and slap SLOH3 on it then charge a small 250% markup like the best in the business!”
Fook Mi / Fook Yu
“What if the Fooks tag team it?”
“Please remove Mr. Chi from the Beer Meister nomination. I would much rather grovel from behind the scenes, than actually have any real responsibility.
“If you’re looking for Flashy Trash, then I’m your Hashy Cock.”
“I spent the last year giving you your *incredible* recaps (two weeks late, if at all), and delegating newbies to take photos for me (since my “trusty” partner Silence of the Clams bailed on me). It’s not easy to recall drunken events, talk sh*t about you wankers, or attempt to be humorous…. but if you f*cktards are stupid enough to allow me to do it again then so be it.”
“I hereby accept the nomination of Hash Cash. I promise you that
I will perform the duties thereof to the best of my abilities.
I will keep track of $5 = one Hasher like nobody has before! Yes
And no longer will I be accepting alternet forms of $5. Let it be known by all the wankers and wankettes that:
$5 does not equal one squeeze of a “squishy”.
$5 does not equal half a “hows yer father?”
$5 does not equal a double underboob sighting.
$5 does not equal a 5 minute “polish-the-pope session”.
And i will no longer be fooled by *giggle* “Here. Hold my panties and bra while I find my 5 dollars in your pocket.” trick. Nope. None of the old Princess. This time I will do Hash Cash right!
-The New and Improved Hash Cash, Sprinkle Princess!”
More-men Less Beer
No speech yet.
Thighs Wide Shut
“Well, I might be a lazy bastard(ess), but at least the website doesn’t look like arse. Just sayin’…”
2012 State of the San Luis Obispo Hash
Sorry for the delay, I know everyone was waiting with breath a bait. I had to think long and hard (unlike so many of our hashers) about the perfect state speech.
The State of the San Luis Obispo Hash is …. wait for it…SLOPPY.
Sincerely, your new Grand Mattress,
- I Can Get You Off
2012 SLOH3 Mis-Management
2011 SLOH3 Mis-Management
2010 SLOH3 Mis-Management
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